Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Down With Reactionary Music!

File-sharing can lead to quite a bit of trouble in China, as 81 Tibetans learned recently. In an apparent attempt to remind Tibetans of exactly why they hate being ruled by the Chinese, Beijing has launched what they’re calling a “strike hard” campaign. Its timing is undoubtedly aimed at giving Tibetans second thoughts about planning protests on the upcoming 50th anniversary of their failed 1959 uprising, which sought to expel the PLA occupation force.

The two arrested specifically for possessing “reactionary songs” join dozens more detained for the same reason in recent weeks. Labeling a song “reactionary” might at first seem like an outdated relic of older times, but people who seriously suggest that should be suspected of being musical rightists, enemies of proper musical class struggle! These bourgeois capitalist-roaders may try to stand in the way of proper revolutionary musical thought, but the great masses of the musical proletariat can see through their ruses. Tibetans merely need to avoid incorrect musical thought, which can be done by allowing their musical culture to take a great leap forward. Tibetan bands (or “musical gangs of four”) should allow a hundred songs to blossom, and a hundred schools of song-writing to contend. Counterrevolutionary music listeners should engage in reform by labor and musical reeducation, so as to cease functioning as tools of the musical aristocracy.

By starting a five year plan of music reform immediately they will advance their own knowledge of Mao Zedong Musical Thought, and help the nation to achieve perfect social harmony and musical socialism. Musical Red Guards will be called upon to purge undesirable musical elements from all songs. The most correct form of music is the (Long) March, whose martial aspects encourage anti-rightist sentiments in every musical work unit.

Now, a question for the Chinese government- if that kind of language sounds silly coming from some random jerk on the internet, how is one to suppose it sounds coming from officials of one of the most powerful nations on Earth?


  1. Wow. You'd think that this stuff would be getting more press in this country. China seems to be acting pretty boldly recently with the whole Barack censoring episode. They probably have that extra "we can do what we feel" sentiment since it's not like they need to worry about the Olympics anymore and they still hold a lot of our money.

  2. That is so interesting!