Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Train of Thought Field Trip: Palin Goes Rogue

Traditionally these posts have focused on Freepers talking about someone they don’t like: liberals, black people, gay people, Asians, women, Europeans, the poor, the educated, anyone who isn’t exactly like them, etc. Today we’re going to see what happens when they start threads about someone they adore: Sarah Palin.

The news broke last night that her book, entitled “Going Rogue: An American Life,” is finished and awaiting its November 17th release date. While most of America is looking forward to reading it ironically, the fine folks of Free Republic believe in this upside-down version of the last election where Sarah Palin actually helped the ticket, instead of sealing its fate and dooming John McCain to failure. Buckets of polling data showing that she essentially handed off huge chunks of independents to Obama be damned, she’s the new hope for the American right!

At least three threads were started to celebrate the news. The appropriately-named Sarah Barracuda gets us started:

To me, going rogue means that someone isn’t gonna
take crap from anyone. She was called “rogue”
during the campaign because she no longer listened
to them(The entire campaign was a train wreck) she
wanted no part of it, and decided to do things her
way, I like it.

The entire campaign was a train wreck, that’s true, but it’s still so bizarre that Free Republic apparently ignores the fact that Palin is the one who derailed the damn train. Newfreep warns that having Palin leave the GOP and form her own nutcase party might not be a good idea:

Going 3rd party will absolutely guarantee ZERO
will win a second term...and many more after
That’s right: if Obama isn’t stopped in 2012, he’ll be dictator-for-life by 2016. How do I know that? Well, you see, ACORN. Uh, and George Soros. Sarah Barracuda returns to the thread to make this bombastic prediction:

Like it says in the article, its her book, her
life, her words. I think Sarah knows this book
will be the most scrutinized book EVER in the
history of books so she knows the deal.
Hahaha, yes, the most scrutinized book EVER in the history of books, I just had to retype that entire bit because my fingers couldn’t believe how stupid it was. Hinckley Buzzard knows something about liberals that the rest of us don’t:

Palin haters won’t buy it. Liberals don’t buy
books, they steal them or borrow them.
Keep in mind their other criticism of liberals is based on reading too many books and being too smart or something, so I’m not sure how you square those two accusations away. Editor-Surveyor pops up next with a comment that wins this edition of the Field Trip Award For Outstanding Achievements In The Field Of Incoherent Posting:

Amazon = Socialist molasses in January.
Prole strikes me as the sort of fellow who shows up at a teabagging event with a be-swastika’d picture of Obama:

Keep flying, Sarah!
The National Socialists and other democrats
can't defeat you! This is truly a battle of
good versus evil.
I get the feeling that HighlyOpinionated knows his numbers are off, but repeats them to show solidarity with the FreepMind:

They’re not printing enough. 1.5 million will
barely cover the crowd in DC on 9-12.
Haha I can play that game too, watch this: 5 million would barely cover the crowd in DC on 9-12! 50 trillion would barely cover the crowd in DC on 9-12! An infinite number beyond the comprehension of the most powerful computers would barely cover the crowd in DC on 9-12! April Lexington has some great advice for Palin:

They are feeding her crap about running from the
center to atttract Lib voters. DON'T DO IT,
SARAH! Its a trap!
Yes, please run even farther to the right, perhaps the rules will change and whoever gets gets the least votes will win in 2012! I think she’ll also get a special award if she manages to alienate every single independent and comes in below 40% of the popular vote. SmokingJoe has a bunch of words for you:

Ummm..they already attacked her more than any
politician in modern history..all it did was
give her close to 1 million Facebook supporters
in just 4 months, virtually neck and neck with
0bozo, who's Facebook page has been up for over
a year longer. That “galvanization” you are
talking about, is galvanization” of ordinary
Americans FOR Palin, rather than against her.
The more they attack her, the stronger she is
going to get. She is going to feed off their
attacks kinda like how Glenn eck is doing right
now. He keeps getting stronger too, the more
the leftist zombies attack him.
Apparently the conservative persecution complex extends to their favorite politicians as well, and Palin is somehow the most attacked politician in modern history. Also, judging political viability by how many Facebook supporters someone has is a brilliant tactic that I may try in the future. LilRhody is next, and boy is he pissed:

Maybe I’ll try Overstock.com. Bought Glenn Becks
book at Borders, and those elitist pigs had the
book in the back of the store where no one could
see it. Of course coming in the front door, was
a table loaded with the murderer Kennedy books,
and in back of that table another one filled with
the Obamination family.
Elitist pigs, putting a book by the president in front of a book by a talking head! Fascists! Bravotu must have some method to his madness, but damned if I can spot it:

Nest EGG!?!
Barracudas Have Nest Eggs?
Perhaps She Will Be ‘Sharpening’
Her ‘Skills’ like a Momma Grizzley !
Uh, yes, perhaps that will be the case. This post by SevenofNine delights me:

OH YEAH I buy that book
Yes me buy book too, be real good, buy book. I sure hope Aphid is right…:

I’d wager that this book was rushed because she’s
working on a second book for spring publication
that will lay out her vision for America. She’ll
want her plan for common sense conservatism in
print, again working around the media.
… because I’m excited to see what kind of cutesy blood-splattered gravedigger horror-inducing fuck you got mine every man against his brother death to the poor and the different gut-wrenching vision of ultimate ruin post-apocalyptic conservatism she comes up with. 9YearLurker closes us out with this relatively harmless post:

I think she could title it “Does Todd poop in the
woods?” and she’d have a best-seller. I’m glad
it’s coming out sooner rather than later.
Conservatives: lining up at the doors to find out about exactly where Todd Palin goes to shit.


  1. I like "sevenofnine"; it looks like Free Republic has a Star Trek Voyager fan in their ranks:


  2. In fairness, I'm definitely going to read that book and pick it to pieces for humorous effect... but also definitely not going to buy it. Maybe there will be an audiobook for convenient downloading!