Tuesday, July 28, 2009

S.P.A.S. Post 1: Palin's Poetisms

Even now, academics and journalists expend considerable effort "decoding," on the most basic level, the statements of Sarah Palin. Is she simply out of her depth, struggling to balance an incoherent narrative in a harsh spotlight? Mentally challenged? Just completely clueless about the basic meaning of the things she speaks about, or even just possibly her very words themselves?


We cannot understand her because she's secretly a poet. Of course, it's long been speculated that what appear to be Sarah Palin's inarticulate ramblings are in fact the work of a poetic genius trapped in the body of that gentle corrupt official. Here are some of Hart Seely's interpretations from last October:

"You Can't Blink"

You can't blink.
You have to be wired
In a way of being
So committed to the mission,

The mission that we're on,
Reform of this country,
And victory in the war,
You can't blink.

So I didn't blink.

(To C. Gibson, ABC News, Sept. 11, 2008)

"Befoulers of the Verbiage"

It was an unfair attack on the verbiage
That Senator McCain chose to use,
Because the fundamentals,
As he was having to explain afterwards,
He means our workforce.
He means the ingenuity of the American.
And of course that is strong,
And that is the foundation of our economy.
So that was an unfair attack there,
Again based on verbiage.

(To S. Hannity, Fox News, Sept. 18, 2008)

"Challenge to a Cynic"

You are a cynic.
Because show me where
I have ever said
That there's absolute proof
That nothing that man
Has ever conducted
Or engaged in,
Has had any effect,
Or no effect,
On climate change.

(To C. Gibson, ABC News, Sept. 11, 2008)

But finally, this week, luminary William Shatner has taken a stance on Palin's poetisms. The answer is now indubitable. Behold Shatner reading a selection from Palin's farewell resignation speech to the nation:

And just in case someone out there hasn't seen it – and for those of you that have, a reminder that it exists – here's a Shatner Bonus:

No comments:

Post a Comment