Can the US afford to Not Bomb Britain?

Teju Cole is an amazing writer, and earlier wrote one of my favorite things ever on Kony 2012 when it was still about the music rather than the dude who founded it masturbating in public. Anyhow, he always seems to nail issues like this so perfectly, and his series of tweets today was so spot on I wanted to share some of the highlights for posterity.

Here are some of my favorites. You can find the full list and interview with Cole here:

US considers surgical strike on UK over sale of chemical weapons to Syria, but won't seek regime change in London.
— Teju Cole (@tejucole) September 3, 2013

Some say incinerating Buckingham Palace would send a message and next time Britain will think twice before selling nerve gas. I don't know.
— Teju Cole (@tejucole) September 3, 2013

And a flood of refugees from Greenwich and Lewisham pouring into St Malo would be Ban Ki-moon's nightmare. The French aren't keen either.
— Teju Cole (@tejucole) September 3, 2013

Nine questions about Britain you were too embarrassed to ask. (Before we begin surgical strikes on Oxford, Bath, and Hull.)
— Teju Cole (@tejucole) September 3, 2013

1 Q. What is Britain? A. Britain is a country in Europe. Its people are called the Britons. Elizabeth II is the Queen of the Britons.
— Teju Cole (@tejucole) September 3, 2013

2 Q. Why are the Britons selling nerve gas chemicals to Syria? A. Money, innit.
— Teju Cole (@tejucole) September 3, 2013

3 Q. That's horrible. How did it all go so wrong in Britain? A. It's an old country with a violent past. Old habits die hard.
— Teju Cole (@tejucole) September 3, 2013

6 Q. Why hasn't the US fixed this yet? A. It's complicated. To burn down Oxford would be sad. Do nothing, and Britain remains dangerous.
— Teju Cole (@tejucole) September 3, 2013

7 Q. So why would Obama bomb the UK if it won't solve the problem? A. To wipe that smirk off Cameron's face. They won't cross us next time.
— Teju Cole (@tejucole) September 3, 2013